Category: People

Hunter Report: 1.5 Years In

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Well the time is cursing by and Hunter is growing up really fast. I thought i’d take another moment to reflect on how things are going.  Some thoughts:

Hunter’s Development

Man is he growing.  The first year now seemed more about physical development. He was just getting bigger and learning how to use his limbs.  Now he seems more about exercising his brain.  He’s constantly trying to figure stuff out.  How to open jars. How doors work.  Why switching a light switch here changes the brightness over there.  Lots of stuff like this are all the rage at our house right now.  So much so that i have found that if you’re not challenging what he knows, he gets bored quickly and then things spiral out of control.  He’s a high bandwidth kid.  I have no idea if this is unusual or not. 

Because this is now the norm, he’s much more of a little person these days.  He has expressions and words and a personality. He’s definitely a human and, to me, he’s getting cuter and cuter. 

The Tradeoff

I recently heard Shondra Rhimes’ Dartmouth commencement address where she talks about how she’s both a working woman and a mother and how she juggles it all.  Her answer: she doesn’t.  I know how she feels.  Prior to Hunter, I would work pretty late almost every night.  Now I like to see Hunter before he goes to sleep.  There’s a struggle between being doing well at work and seeing my family, and I don’t think there’s a good answer.  Ultimately, I’ll always be failing at one of them.  I’m having to get used to that fact.  It’s quite a change. 

Shondra says it much better than I:

If I am killing it on a Scandal script for work, I’m probably missing bath and story time at home. If I am at home sewing my kids’ Halloween costumes, I am probably blowing off a script I was supposed to rewrite. If I’m accepting a prestigious award, I’m missing my baby’s first swim lesson. If I am at my daughter’s debut in her school musical, I am missing Sandra Oh’s last scene ever being filmed at Grey’s Anatomy.

If I am succeeding at one, I am inevitably failing at the other. That is the trade off. That is the Faustian bargain one makes with the devil that comes with being a powerful working woman who is also a powerful mother. You never feel one hundred percent okay, you never get your sea legs, you are always a little nauseous. Something is always lost.

Old People

I’m constantly amazed how similar babies are to old people.  The drooling, the babbling, the lack of coordination.  Just very very similar. Circle of life. 

Default State of Happiness

When Hunter wakes up in the morning, he’s smiling. By default, he’s happy.  He’s giggling and smiling unless something happens to make him upset. It makes me think that this is the default state for most humans.  I often think about this.  I wonder that if we have to have something negative happen to us to be in a permanent bad mood.  I see people yelling at traffic or walking the street with a frown on their face.  They weren’t born that way.  Something has happened.  When i’m feeling upset or sad, I try to remember that.  It’s the world interacting with me that got me there.  It’s not how I am by default.  I like that thought. 

 

Earn Points with Grandma: The Postgram App

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I was visiting my grandmother last weekend.  This is the same grandmother that was spotted on the streets of Manhattan at age 90 and asked to be a model for GNC (blog post: My Grandmother is Amazing).  She was remarking about how she loves to see photos of the great-grandkids.  I have one cousin who sends her an email of a picture every day.  I left feeling like i was really laking in my picture sending.  

Then, enter the Postgram App.  With this app, i can grab any picture on my phone or in Instagram and send it as a postcard.  You enter in a message and an address and it gets sent automatically.  Viola. 

Now, my grandma is getting mail all the time of pictures.  Yes!

 

Things I’ll Remember About 2013

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2013 was an interesting year.  Here are a few of the things I’ll remember about it:

Diane and I bought our first house.  After 3 years in Denver, we moved up to Boulder and bought a nice little house in North Boulder.  It’s the perfect size and location.  It’s close both to downtown (where we work) and the mountains so our commute is nothing and we can walk to the hiking trails.  It’s a huge game changer.

My stint as a single parent.  I’ll never forget the 10 weeks I spent taking care of Hunter.  The baths, the feedings, the walks, the coordinating with the nanny – I got to really understand what it’s like to be responsible.  I really think it’s made me a much better parent now having that experience.  It also made Diane really happy which makes me happy.  I love it when she  shines – there’s nothing better. 

I lost 20 pounds.  During that time with Hunter, i got into a running routine and ate a bunch less for dinner, and as a result i dropped some serious weight. Although i put some back on over the holidays, it was game changing for me.  I feel a lot better both physically and mentally.  I’m still keeping to the 4x a week routine and should be able to keep the weight down to 170-175 (I was at 193)

This past year was a pivotal year for Kapost.  We really grew the business and we hired some incredible folks.  We went from 13 people to 42 and from under 400k in revenue to 1.8MM. 

The Boulder flood was an incredible experience.  Seeing that much rain and what i can do to a town is frightening.  It destroyed our basement but nowhere near what it did to others.  Seeing a rush of water crush down your front door is a nightmare.   Here’s a video of a friend’s apartment building where they all had to be rescued from the second floor. 

Becoming an uncle. I’m so happy for Liz and Mike.  Knowing all the crap they went through to try to have a kid, then to finally get pregnant, then to have such a beautiful girl come into the world – I’m so happy both for them and for me.  It’s really fun having that girl around and i can’t wait for Hunter and Reagan to become friends. 

Those are the things that pop out in my mind in 2013.  Here’s to a great 2014!

 

Siri and the Digital Natives

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I wrote a post a few years ago about cognitive surplus and how we’re all doing more and more stuff on the web.  One of the stories in that post was: 

I was having dinner with a group of friends about a month ago, and one of them was talking about sitting with his four-year-old daughter watching a DVD. And in the middle of the movie, apropos nothing, she jumps up off the couch and runs around behind the screen. That seems like a cute moment. Maybe she’s going back there to see if Dora is really back there or whatever. But that wasn’t what she was doing. She started rooting around in the cables. And her dad said, “What you doing?” And she stuck her head out from behind the screen and said, “Looking for the mouse.”

Here’s something four-year-olds know: A screen that ships without a mouse ships broken. Here’s something four-year-olds know: Media that’s targeted at you but doesn’t include you may not be worth sitting still for. Those are things that make me believe that this is a one-way change. Because four year olds, the people who are soaking most deeply in the current environment, who won’t have to go through the trauma that I have to go through of trying to unlearn a childhood spent watching Gilligan’s Island, they just assume that media includes consuming, producing and sharing.

This was 5 years ago.  Since then we’ve had some new technology advancements – such as Siri and voice search.  I’m seeing the impacts of this on my 1-year old (Hunter) every day.  

Both my wife and i have iPhones and we  regularly use Siri to compose text messages as we frequently have our son in our arms and no hands free.  As a result, he thinks this is just the way you interact with phones.  Check these videos out: 

 

These kids are definitely going to have a different experience with technology than the rest of us.  It’ll be fascinating to see.  

Mr. Mom: Things I’ve Learned

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So, i don’t know if i’ve told you this, Dear Reader, but I’ve been doing the Mr. Mom thing over here for 3 week.  I’m doing this because Diane is working in Colorado Springs Monday-Friday on a film.  It’s always been her dream to both work in Colorado and work on films.  This was her first opportunity, and passing on it was just not in the cards.  So, i’m not at home, a la Michael Keaton.

So, what have I learned in these three weeks: Continue reading “Mr. Mom: Things I’ve Learned” →

Be a Little Kinder

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This speech, sent to me by my cousin Nelly, really made my night tonight.  It’s by Syracuse professor and NYTimes writer George Saunders.

I think it’s a great message we all should listen to:

Down through the ages, a traditional form has evolved for this type of speech, which is: Some old fart, his best years behind him, who, over the course of his life, has made a series of dreadful mistakes (that would be me), gives heartfelt advice to a group of shining, energetic young people, with all of their best years ahead of them (that would be you).

And I intend to respect that tradition.

Now, one useful thing you can do with an old person, in addition to borrowing money from them, or asking them to do one of their old-time “dances,” so you can watch, while laughing, is ask: “Looking back, what do you regret?”  And they’ll tell you.  Sometimes, as you know, they’ll tell you even if you haven’t asked.  Sometimes, even when you’ve specifically requested they not tell you, they’ll tell you.

So: What do I regret?  Being poor from time to time?  Not really.  Working terrible jobs, like “knuckle-puller in a slaughterhouse?”  (And don’t even ASK what that entails.)  No.  I don’t regret that.  Skinny-dipping in a river in Sumatra, a little buzzed, and looking up and seeing like 300 monkeys sitting on a pipeline, pooping down into the river, the river in which I was swimming, with my mouth open, naked?  And getting deathly ill afterwards, and staying sick for the next seven months?  Not so much.  Do I regret the occasional humiliation?  Like once, playing hockey in front of a big crowd, including this girl I really liked, I somehow managed, while falling and emitting this weird whooping noise, to score on my own goalie, while also sending my stick flying into the crowd, nearly hitting that girl?  No.  I don’t even regret that. Continue reading “Be a Little Kinder” →

Student Debt in America

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I listened to this podcast (This Week in Venture Capital) about a company focusing on organizing a students debt and loans. More than the company, the stats really stuck out for me.  Here they some and what they mean:

Student debt is HUGE. Student debt over last 10 years has doubled to a trillion dollars.  Here’ the breakdown:

Debt in America
People can’t get jobs still. 50% of people graduating from University are unemployed or underemployed

It’s not just poor, it’s a lot of people. 2/3 of all students graduating in 2008 took on debt

It’s a problem that isn’t being solved. Of the 2008 grads that took on debt only 22% of these are current (aka up to speed on their payments)
It’s not just young people anymore. 34% of all outstanding debt in US is held by people 40 years or older

This is fundamental problem in America and it’s impacting everyone at all ages and areas.  I feel like it should get great attention and be a bigger part of the “what’s wrong with America” conversation.

Luckily, the changes in the education system will cause more schools with more affordable opportunities to emerge.  Kahn Academy U can’t come fast enough apparently.

Foot, Meet Mouth: Hunter Sleeping Edition

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Last week i said the words about Hunter, 

The little guy sleeps!  Yes, he seems to be good at his sleeping. He doesn’t like going to sleep but once he’s there he crushes it from 6-8pm to 6am.  It’s a beautiful thing. 

I spoke WAY too early.  Since then the little guy has been regularly waking up at 3am and crying his face off until we feed him.  Um, yeah, that’s not so fun.  My bad, internet gods, i promise not to do it again. 

Baby Thoughts: 5 Months Edition

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Ok people, my sister’s post inspired me. Here are my current thoughts about the whole baby situation.

The little guy sleeps!  Yes, he seems to be good at his sleeping. He doesn’t like going to sleep but once he’s there he crushes it from 6-8pm to 6am.  It’s a beautiful thing. 

Ever since i was 18, i’ve become really good at not hanging out at my house. I loved to meet people for drinks, go to concerts, parties, dinners, etc.. I used to never go home. I never cooked.  Seriously.  When Diane moved into my apartment in LA, i still had the shrinkwrap casing on my oven. I had literally never used it.  Why do i mention all this?  Well, the little guy goes down every night at 6pm and once that happens we are tethered to our home. Every night. We have to be there.  And while it’s really great that the little guy sleeps, it’s really weird to have to be inside our home all night every night.  I have not developed my hang-out-at-home skills. Any suggestions?  

My commute sucks. It’s never really bothered me before but that’s because i was leaving at 7 or 8pm and could cruise sans traffic.  Now that the little guy goes down early, i’m trying to get home early and have a new appreciation for why rush hour exists. There went 1-2 hours of my life every day. 

I have a new respect for Pixar movies.  We just watched Finding Nemo last night and now i’ve seen the Madagascar film a few more times.  Those are legit films. 

My baby is just getting cuter.  He’s non-stop smiles.  It’s pretty awesome. 

And hanging out with Uncle Mckenzie.