Be a Little Kinder

This speech, sent to me by my cousin Nelly, really made my night tonight.  It’s by Syracuse professor and NYTimes writer George Saunders.

I think it’s a great message we all should listen to:

Down through the ages, a traditional form has evolved for this type of speech, which is: Some old fart, his best years behind him, who, over the course of his life, has made a series of dreadful mistakes (that would be me), gives heartfelt advice to a group of shining, energetic young people, with all of their best years ahead of them (that would be you).

And I intend to respect that tradition.

Now, one useful thing you can do with an old person, in addition to borrowing money from them, or asking them to do one of their old-time “dances,” so you can watch, while laughing, is ask: “Looking back, what do you regret?”  And they’ll tell you.  Sometimes, as you know, they’ll tell you even if you haven’t asked.  Sometimes, even when you’ve specifically requested they not tell you, they’ll tell you.

So: What do I regret?  Being poor from time to time?  Not really.  Working terrible jobs, like “knuckle-puller in a slaughterhouse?”  (And don’t even ASK what that entails.)  No.  I don’t regret that.  Skinny-dipping in a river in Sumatra, a little buzzed, and looking up and seeing like 300 monkeys sitting on a pipeline, pooping down into the river, the river in which I was swimming, with my mouth open, naked?  And getting deathly ill afterwards, and staying sick for the next seven months?  Not so much.  Do I regret the occasional humiliation?  Like once, playing hockey in front of a big crowd, including this girl I really liked, I somehow managed, while falling and emitting this weird whooping noise, to score on my own goalie, while also sending my stick flying into the crowd, nearly hitting that girl?  No.  I don’t even regret that. Continue reading “Be a Little Kinder”

Student Debt in America

I listened to this podcast (This Week in Venture Capital) about a company focusing on organizing a students debt and loans. More than the company, the stats really stuck out for me.  Here they some and what they mean:

Student debt is HUGE. Student debt over last 10 years has doubled to a trillion dollars.  Here’ the breakdown:

Debt in America
People can’t get jobs still. 50% of people graduating from University are unemployed or underemployed

It’s not just poor, it’s a lot of people. 2/3 of all students graduating in 2008 took on debt

It’s a problem that isn’t being solved. Of the 2008 grads that took on debt only 22% of these are current (aka up to speed on their payments)
It’s not just young people anymore. 34% of all outstanding debt in US is held by people 40 years or older

This is fundamental problem in America and it’s impacting everyone at all ages and areas.  I feel like it should get great attention and be a bigger part of the “what’s wrong with America” conversation.

Luckily, the changes in the education system will cause more schools with more affordable opportunities to emerge.  Kahn Academy U can’t come fast enough apparently.

Foot, Meet Mouth: Hunter Sleeping Edition

Last week i said the words about Hunter

The little guy sleeps!  Yes, he seems to be good at his sleeping. He doesn’t like going to sleep but once he’s there he crushes it from 6-8pm to 6am.  It’s a beautiful thing. 

I spoke WAY too early.  Since then the little guy has been regularly waking up at 3am and crying his face off until we feed him.  Um, yeah, that’s not so fun.  My bad, internet gods, i promise not to do it again. 

Baby Thoughts: 5 Months Edition

Ok people, my sister’s post inspired me. Here are my current thoughts about the whole baby situation.

The little guy sleeps!  Yes, he seems to be good at his sleeping. He doesn’t like going to sleep but once he’s there he crushes it from 6-8pm to 6am.  It’s a beautiful thing. 

Ever since i was 18, i’ve become really good at not hanging out at my house. I loved to meet people for drinks, go to concerts, parties, dinners, etc.. I used to never go home. I never cooked.  Seriously.  When Diane moved into my apartment in LA, i still had the shrinkwrap casing on my oven. I had literally never used it.  Why do i mention all this?  Well, the little guy goes down every night at 6pm and once that happens we are tethered to our home. Every night. We have to be there.  And while it’s really great that the little guy sleeps, it’s really weird to have to be inside our home all night every night.  I have not developed my hang-out-at-home skills. Any suggestions?  

My commute sucks. It’s never really bothered me before but that’s because i was leaving at 7 or 8pm and could cruise sans traffic.  Now that the little guy goes down early, i’m trying to get home early and have a new appreciation for why rush hour exists. There went 1-2 hours of my life every day. 

I have a new respect for Pixar movies.  We just watched Finding Nemo last night and now i’ve seen the Madagascar film a few more times.  Those are legit films. 

My baby is just getting cuter.  He’s non-stop smiles.  It’s pretty awesome. 

And hanging out with Uncle Mckenzie. 

9 weeks in: a report

I last did a report about life with Hunter when I was 3 weeks in.  Since then, I’ve learned a few more things.

Getting up in the middle of the night repeatedly can make a man (and mom) batshit crazy.  For us (and most people), the getting up in the middle of the night to feed the child never stops and is totally exhausting.  Diane and I are taking turns who gets up for the main feeding in the middle of the night.  We found that if the same person keeps doing it, that person becomes not so fun to hang out with.  We’ll see how this new experiment goes.

Hunter is not always happy

Continue reading “9 weeks in: a report”

David Brooks: A Good Marriage is Equal to Doubling Your Income

David Brooks, one of the better columnists out there was interviewed by Alec Baldwin a few months ago on the Here’s the Thing podcast.  It’s a really interesting interview.  The entire thing is here but below is my favorite 4 minutes of the interview is where he talks about the book he wrote and why it’s so important to choose a good spouse.

The first few seconds of this clip below is about his book is about why kids drop out of high school. He found in his research that you can tell in the first 18 months of kid’s life whether they will or not.  Apparently, kids who can form attachments at an early age can form emotional attachments with teachers and peers later in life and they’ll generally be okay.  If you can’t, life if very frustrating.

The second part of this short clip he shares some of his thoughts on marriage.  I found it interesting to hear that he goes around and tells people, “If you have a great career and a crappy marriage, you’ll be miserable. If you have a crappy career and a great marriage, you’ll be happy.”  I like the thought of that.  If this is true, then all the courses you should take in college should be about who you should marry.

He then talks more about happiness and makes the point that money only correlates a little to happiness and that studies have shown that, of people who are happy, they have a good marriage and that the happiness gain of a good marriage is equal to that of doubling your income.

The link to listen to the pod is here

This may be why I was so willing to quit my job in 2009 – because I was about to get married.

3 Weeks In: A Report

Well, Hunter came into the world three weeks ago.  A few people have asked how it’s going.  Here are some initial thoughts:

There are some new experiences. Here’s one. Never in my life have ever not been able to go to sleep when i’m tired.  If i’m really tired at the end of a day and something comes up, i’ve always (if I’m really tired) been abel to push that item off till  the morning or do some small action to appease it enough where i can still go to bed.  Even in college, i’d take short power naps when i got really tired in the middle of the night. I’ve never been forced to stay awake, ever.  Until now. Not being able to go to sleep because a baby is just crying its face off is a new experience and it’s quite painful.

 

Continue reading “3 Weeks In: A Report”

Welcome Hunter!

We had a big change in the Lewhouse family this week.  On Monday afternoon at 5:25, we welcomed Hunter Lewis into the world. He’s definitely keeping us busy and now that we figured out how to actually get food into him. We’re rolling – at least so we think.  If you’re interested, you can read below for a timeline log of the actual birth and how it went down.

Continue reading “Welcome Hunter!”